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Top 5 Annoying Female Behaviors

October 5, 2010 advice

What Is She REALLY Saying?

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Ah, the complexity of the female language- it’s like we’re speaking our own doesn’t it? Sometimes, we say something hoping you’ll read between the lines, decode it,  and act accordingly. But we know it’s not that simple. It’s also not simple for us to just come out and say things in plain “man” language, because it might be too harsh. So MankindUnplugged is hooking you up with some of the more common phrases you hear, DECODED. Cheers.

When She Says:

“I’m fine!”

What She Means Is:

I’m upset, annoyed, or bothered right now, but I don’t feel like talking about it. Ask me again later when I feel like talking. When is later? I don’t know. Just… later.

SIDE NOTE: only ask your lady if she’s OK twice. If she won’t talk, she doesn’t want to.

When She Says:

“I saw this really cute (insert desirable item here), but I don’t know if I should get it or not. I’m gonna’ think about it.”

What She Means Is:

BUY IT FOR ME. Since you don’t normally pick things out I like as gifts, – I’m making it easier on you by hinting.

When She Says:

I really need to lose some weight.

What She Means Is:

Whether I actually need to lose weight or not, is beside the point. I’m feeling wack and need you to say something nice about me. Preferably, something about how hot I look.

SIDENOTE: If she brushes off your compliment, she’s either really feeling bad about herself or you didn’t deliver the compliment convincingly enough. But whatever you do, don’t agree with her needing to lose weight. Even if she does.

When She Says:

Why don’t you start playing some ball with your friends on weekends?

What She Means Is:

I need some alone time and you’re getting a little pudgy. I don’t want to offend you with either of these truths, hence the kind suggestion. Now go out, lose some pounds and leave me to my weekend beauty rituals.

When She Says:

Do you think she’s cute?

What She Means Is:

I think she’s cute, but really, I think YOU think she’s cute. I don’t want you to think she’s cute – so this is a test to see if I was right in picking the kind of girl I think you would like.

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