Knowing when to elevate a relationship to the next phase can be mind-boggling especially for those that tend to overthink everything. You met this hot girl and now you are trying to figure out, what’s next…
After going on a few dates, you are sure that you like her, but it seems like she just isn’t into you. Maybe she is shy, maybe she is just out for a free meal. Who knows…
Regardless of what you perceive her motives to be, you can rest in knowing that there are probably only two valid reasons:
1. She REALLY is just NOT INTO YOU or
2. She likes you, but there is no communication; she is scared to show you how she feels because she is unsure about your feelings for her
Don’t worry, in most cases the answer will be #2. A woman who is not into you wouldn’t go on multiple dates. Then again, if she is looking for a free meal, she just may.
Women usually know after the first and at the least the second date if we are interested in dating a man or if we want to “just be friends”. If we want to be friends, we usually communicate this to you as soon as there is an opportunity or we avoid all your attempts at communication. Translation, we send you to voice mail. Since we tend to be pretty self conscious, we feel guilty if we lead you.
So, there you go.
If you think she likes you, let her know that you are into her before the train leaves the building.
If you like her, make it official! Depending on her personality and what she likes doing in her spare time, maybe invite her to lunch or dinner. Taking her to a nice restaurant shows that you are really into her and enjoy spending time with her. If you are a nature lover, organize a picnic in her favourite park. Maybe invite her to the movies, or maybe plan an evening at the bowling alley. Regardless of what you choose, plan on doing something.
Openly communicating your feelings to her can be challenging, but hanging out is easy. No matter how sophisticated and tuff we as 21st century women are, we like to be treated as a women and by spending time with us, you are showing us that you just may be interested.
Relationship and Career Coach